Just find out that I been learn to cheat my own self from last year.
I cheat my own self every day, every time , and always.
Still, I think I am telling the truth to myself.
I am scarce to be leave by everyone and be lonely again.
That’s why I try to let myself become a part of anyone.
I can’t deny I am still admiring you.
Every message, every word, although it been deleted, but they are still fresh in my mind.
I am really sorry about that.
I am not really forgot everything about you.
It just like your phone number still exists in my headphone contact list.
I still can message you anytime as I want to.
But, it only can be a dream. They never existed before.
I love you; it can be a simple word and also a word which are difficult for me to say.
Can I choose to be silent?
Give me a second, pass by you and we look at each other for a few second?
Does it tough for me and you?
It is tough for me.
I cannot just pass by you and look at you for a few second, but I want to have a simple conversation with you.
Can I have that opportunity? Do I deserve?
Can you just show me your face and tell me now?
Somehow I am very emotional now.
Think of everything which is impossible and be exhausted there.
What the hell! I can’t accept this kind of characteristic live inside of me for a second!
I don’t want to accept it! I choose not to accept it!
Everything in this world just scrabbles together in my head now.
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